Anxiety
Anxiety. I felt it deep down in my core when my twin babies arrived in this world. They were 36 weeks 5 days old preemies when they were born. I had a successful vaginal delivery for my twins. However, as soon as baby A came out, baby B found that he now had a lot of room, and he changed his position from head down to breech. My doctor had to pull him out from butt first and… it caused him a clavicle fracture. What a horrible mom. It felt like my fault so I began to criticize myself because I chose the vaginal delivery for the faster healing. I started to think, ‘If I had chosen the Caesarean section, my babies might have been just fine’. This thought broke me in pieces. It stabbed my heart every second. My poor tiny newborn.. I couldn’t stop feeling anxious. As we came back to the room from the delivery room, the reality started hitting me, ‘Wow, now I am responsible for those two infants’. I sat down on the bed and there my babies were, exactly 5 pounds, tiny like the size of a hand, precious obviously, miraculous just the way they are and how healthy they are and brave to be brought out in this world and getting used to it.
I was very scared to hold them. 5 pound babies. That’s the weight of the dumbbells I choose for easy workout days. I was literally shaking. I was afraid I’d drop them accidently. The doctors at the hospital laughed at me and told me to take it easy but I simply couldn’t. I was terrified if I was holding them wrongly. I was frightened that I think I am not good enough to be their mom. I couldn’t sleep for 6 entire days after the labor because I had to continuously check if my babies were still breathing/alive. Thankfully, my husband who was born to be a dad super naturally picked up all the baby duties. Changed their diapers, fed them, burped them and swaddled them. It made me think, why don’t I have the maternal nature that other women seem to just naturally have? What am I anxious about?
I had to make changes. I had to be there for my baby twins. I couldn’t give babies to nurses for feeding anymore. Then I began to work on mindfulness practice. Mindfulness is a type of meditation in which you focus on being intensely aware of what you're sensing and feeling in the moment, without interpretation or judgment. Practicing mindfulness involves breathing methods, guided imagery, and other practices to relax the body and mind and reduce stress.
As I was focused on simply breathing, I found stillness in my heart. As I found stillness in my heart, I began to concentrate on what's going on in my mind. As I began to concentrate I could start noticing where in my body I felt uncomfortable. As I start noticing I could relieve the tensions in my neck, shoulders and arms (by attempting to hold babies in such an awkward position due to anxiety). As I started relieving tensions, I could observe what thoughts were coming in and out of me. As I began to observe I could think logically but without judgment.
My thoughts were: They are so small. I had them at 36 week 5 days. They are preemies. I am extremely selfish because I chose vaginal delivery. I am not good enough. I don’t deserve them…
I recognized those thoughts and I chose to let them go. I kept on breathing in and out deeply and I showed sympathy and love for myself. ‘I was very brave to deliver two healthy babies’, ‘Babies naturally heal very fast and he will be okay’, ‘I will eventually overcome the fear of being a new mom and I have endless support from my husband, families and friends’.
I didn’t bring acupuncture needles to the hospital so I decided to do acupressure on myself. It’s similar to acupuncture. Instead of using needles, you put pressure on certain acupoints on your body. Pressing those acupoints can relax your muscles and help you to calm down. I chose a few acupoints to work on, then I pressed those points gently. On the third eye, on the hands and on the ears. As I applied the pressure on the acupoints, I could instantly notice that my thoughts slowed down and It led me to find inner peace. Eventually, I could start thinking logically that it’s common for babies to have clavicle fractures during labor, babies heal very fast and they need me more than anyone.
I felt the power of acupressure. It was an amazing experience to be the living example of ‘Traditional Chinese Medicine actually works’. Since then, when I start to feel anxious (I am a human and a new mom. Obviously I have anxious moments.) I apply acupressure. It helps me to be a calm (I am getting there) and non-reactive mom.
Acupuncture (acupressure) helps miraculously as well as meditation, mindfulness practice and therapy.
I can proudly say, ALL my patients love my acupressure Tuina (massage originated in ancient China and is believed to be the oldest system of bodywork) that I often perform as the ending/ closure of an acupuncture session. It works amazingly for not only anxiety disorder, insomnia, addiction issues, depression, etc but also physical pain such as migraines, neck, back and shoulder pain. In fact, my acupuncture treatment is so relaxing that a lot of them take a nap during the treatment. They call it acu-nap. After the treatment, they feel energized, rested, relaxed in both mind and body.
Here’s some brief information about what acupuncture can do for anxiety.
Reduce stress
Stimulate the nerves that release hormones, such as endorphins, which are known as the brain’s natural pain relievers
Relieve pain
Improve quality of sleep
Decrease frequency of mood swings and irritability
Balance hormones
Help you to relax
Harmonize brain waves to restore balance in your body
Are you currently dealing with anxiety? You don’t have to go through it alone.
Call (425) 202-5060 to talk with me. I am here for you.
